So you’re looking for a dog that will set you apart from the crowd, your friends, and everybody you know?
You’re in luck, because in this guide we will give you the ten least popular dog breeds, according to the American Kennel Club.
Plus–we will tell you just what makes each breed so eccentric that hardly anybody wants it.
And there’s always a reason.
Says Barking Up The Wrong Tree Breeding Bandits founder Julie Wobblegang, “There are specific reasons these breeds are not popular. Much of their unpopularity stems from the eccentricities of these dogs.”
Eccentricities is a nice way of saying that these breeds have odd, and in some cases, nasty, habits.
No matter what breed you choose to command, remember this sound advice from the AKC:
Owning a dog is not just a privilege; it’s a responsibility. They depend on us for, at minimum, food and shelter, and deserve much more. When you take a dog into your life, you need to understand the commitment that dog ownership entails.
Without further ado, for your consideration…
Here’s our list of the ten least popular dog breeds
Courtesy American Kennel Club
Harrier
From the AKC
The Harrier is a swift, prey-driven pack hound of medium size first bred in medieval England to chase the hare. Outgoing and friendly, the Harrier is much larger than the Beagle but smaller than another close relative, the English Foxhound.
Eccentricity: Insecure
The Harrier might be friendly, but he has two chips on his shoulder.
First, he is forever attempting to outshine the Beagle, who he believes is conspiring, through a secret selective breeding program with St. Bernards, to outstrip him in physical strength. This means that the Harrier will go out of its way to demonstrate feats of strength. Whether its moving your couch, toppling your refrigerator, or dragging your Prius, when the Harrier’s strength insecurities show up, you should hope that everything that can be bolted down is indeed bolted down.
The Harrier also suffers from identity insecurity. The Harrier has never accepted the fact that it could have been an English Foxhound, and that somewhere along the line somebody decided to reduce it from an English Foxhound to a Harrier, whatever the hell that is. The Harrier, however, has this one consolation, that it was not bred to the low standard of the common Beagle.
The Harrier means well, but it needs constant reassurance that it is indeed a strong dog and a genetically acceptable dog. While your Harrier might not be an English Foxhound, you will need to spend several minutes each morning reassuring your Harrier that it is not a Beagle, that it is just as strong as an English Foxhound, and that if you were an English Foxhound being bred, you would want to be bred along to Harrier status.
Courtesy American Kennel Club
Grand Basset Griffon Vendeens
From the AKC
He’s a sweet-faced, long-eared fellow in a shaggy coat whose mustache, beard, and profuse eyebrows suggest the look of a worldly but amiable Frenchman. Beneath the Grand’s Old World charm is a rugged, sturdily-built bruiser who is deceptively quick and light-footed. The stamina and courage of these longer-than-tall hunters is the stuff of Gallic legend.
Eccentriticity: Swift of Snide
Grand, charming, and worldly, don’t let this breed fool you: on the International Scale of Snide (ISS), the Grand Basset ranks just below the late Harry Reid.
Merriam-Webster’s dictionary offers both “deceptive” and “slyly despairaging” among three definitions of the word snide. And these two definitions describe the Grand Basset Griffon Vendeens, often called the GBGV.
Its long Gallic history is marked with any number of instances of trickery and deception, all of which it is eager to proffer in your household.
One of the GBGV’s most profound deceptions is its capacity for swiftness.
Though it appears as calm as a Frenchman sipping coffee at Café de la Paix, the GBGV can, with neither warning nor notice, spring into action with lightning speed.
One of its famous variations on this theme is to feign sleep, and when you have let your guard down, to spring up and leap for your food, catching it mid-leap, then moving with blinding speed out of arm’s reach.
The pads of its feet, and the delicacy with which it walks, mean that even on freshly waxed wood floors GBGV is sure of foot and won’t lose a step.
Through disparaging remarks (all of which, we might add, are never stated explicitly, but only implied), GBGV has also learned to deal with enemies and those it deems “of lesser breeding”. That calm face, which gives every impression of sangfroid, never reveals the utter contempt the breed holds for all sentient creatures.
One of its most disparaging maneuvers is to mock all who call it GBGV.
“Jooba-jooba-jooba-jooba,” it says.
Courtesy American Kennel Club
Cesky Terriers
From the AKC
The Cesky Terrier, national dog of the Czech Republic, is a clever and adventurous playmate for kids and an eager walking buddy for the folks. They are tenacious at work, but a little more laid back and tractable than the usual terrier.
Eccentricity: Craftily Hypnotic, Destructive Flight from Strangers
The Cesky is known for great intelligence but also has a tricky and crafty streak. If given the opportunity, the Cesky will attempt to deceive its owner through a variety of machinations.
The owner must exercise caution as the Cesky is a prey dog and as such has a high instinct for going after prey
Being crafty, the Cesky might select its owner as its prey. Ceskys have been known to cut the electricity, flush cell phones, barricade doors, set mattresses on fire, and entrap owners in their own homes.
They are also experts at hypnosis. Without a word they are able to use eye, head, and tail movements to bewitch and hypnotize their owners in a fashion that Ericksonian hypnotherapist Gail Summers has called “the devil in the details.”
But the hypnotic techniques only emerge in a Cesky that feels at home; Ceskys are so wary of strangers that they have been known to bolt away when they notice a stranger nearby.
Luckily, a Cesky pays little attention to strangers, preferring to focus most or all of its attention on its owner, on whom it assiduously works out its perfect plan of to attain hegemony through hypnosis.
Courtesy American Kennel Club
Finnish Spitz
From the AKC
The lively Finnish Spitz, the flame-colored, foxy-faced breed from the ‘Land of 60,000 Lakes,’ is a small but fearless hunting dog whose unique style of tracking and indicating quarry has earned him the nickname the ‘Barking Bird Dog.’
Eccentricity: Locquaciousness
Known for its many vocalizations and sociability, the Finnish Spitz, or Finky, takes canine chattiness to new extremes. In one instance, in Finland in 1974, a Finky spoke for 113 hours before lapping up about a half gallon of water, served to him in a silver mug, then dropping dead.
The Finky is a keen vocalist as well as linguist, capable of learning in excess of 8,000 words in any language in just two years.
While this would appear to make the Finky an ideal companion for the lonely, it in fact deters most Americans from seeking its company.
The fact is that once this chatterbox begins talking, it rarely stops. Non sequitors, red herrings, sarcasm, ad hominem, and endless puns will rule the day.
Pyrenean Shepherds
From the AKC
The Pyr Shep is a high-energy dog who is always on alert and ready for action…always eager to channel their abundant energy into…interesting challenges and activities. Lots of activity and a job to do are vital to the breed’s mental, emotional, and physical health.
Eccentricity: Mind Meld
The Pyrenean Shepherd, or Pyr Shep, has a tendency to become heavily involved emotionally and psychologically with its owner, which has caused many would-be owners to keep this dog at arm’s length.
While the Cesky Terrier will seek to hypnotically manipulate its owner, the Pyr Shep has an obsessive-compulsive tendency to connect at a deep subconscious level with its owner–to feel what the owner feels, to predict thoughts and movements.
This might not seem like a problem, and for the lonely or under-socialized human this might seem appealing.
But after extended propinquity with their owners, Pyr Sheps perform a mind meld, and it’s through this mind meld that they exchange thoughts with their owners.
The coup de grace occurs when the Pyr Shep uses these mind meld techniques in conjunction with its body-check style of herding and herds its owner. The Pyr Shep, of course, basks in the connection with the owner. By herding the owner, the Pyr Shep feels a deep oneness, especially if the owner panics: the Pyr Shep is gratified when it alleviates its herded owner’s fears.
Because of the task-oriented nature of the breed, and its extreme positivity, through which it believes in the power of YES for each task, owners who have no experience being herded by canines might find the breed unnerving, even insane.
Courtesy American Kennel Club
Sloughis
From the AKC
The ancient Sloughi, nicknamed the ‘Arabian Greyhound,’ is a lean, swift coursing hound who hunted a variety of game in North African deserts. A classic sighthound, the Sloughi is regally aloof with strangers and gentle with loved ones. The Sloughi (SLOO-ghee) is a classically constructed sighthound of ancient lineage, originally bred to work on such game as the hare, fox, jackal, gazelle, and wild pigs on the punishing terrain of its homeland. This is a lean, no-frills hound standing between 24 to 29 inches at the shoulder.
Eccentricity: Gracefulness Demonstrations
Ever since Queen Nefertiti described her Sloughi to King Balostos of Spain as “the epitome of grace,” Sloughis have believed themselves to be the world’s most graceful canine, and have spent considerable time proving it.
This tendency irks many Americans, who find that the breed shows off with too great a frequency for their taste.
“It’s a matter of decorum,” says Sloughi breeder and trainer Balsa Woode. “We spend months and years training even a single Sloughi that while it is acceptable to be graceful, it is also graceful to be acceptable. There is a time and place for such gracefulness, and there is gracefulness for such a place and time.”
Sloughis are not especially protective. Aloof toward strangers, even intruders, yet many Sloughi owners have found that in the presence of such strangers the Sloughi twists itself into several odd shapes and takes a number of bizarre positions. They act as if it is the most natural thing in the world for a dog to take the shape of a question mark, as if this is what everyone did, and why shouldn’t they?
One of the more popular Sloughi poses is The Stretch. The Sloughi stands on one hind leg, curls up the other, then positions its forelegs in an L shape.
The Sloughi is also fond of aerial displays of grace, at which it excels. One common routines finds the Sloughi trotting through an open space, such as a backyard, leaping upward like a deer, and while in the air alternates extending opposite front and back legs. This is known as the bounding splay.
“It is certainly a marvel to behold,” says Balsa Woode, “but what irks owners is that the Sloughi demands attention from owners all the time.”
Sloughis might perform the bounding splay across the dinner table, sometimes landing on the table, in the middle of the main course, to demonstrate a coil, or some other odd configuration, that they want their owners to appreciate.
Another pitfall of the Sloughi’s eccentricity is the tendency for unwary owners to be caught up in mimicking the breed’s actions.
“Captivated by the breed’s grace and beauty, I have seen owners perform alongside the Sloughi, following each move,” says Balsa Woode. “A thing of ecstacy.”
Belgian Laekenois
From the AKC
Strong, agile and full of life, the Belgian Laekenois (pronounced “Lak-in-wah”) is one of four native dogs of Belgium.
Eccentricity: Methane
The Laekenois, which in Belgian means “little stinker,” while a hard worker, enjoys clandestine gas passing.
It has no qualms about letting fly the most foul flatulence, whether at home or in the field. Some consider this behavior to be malicious, while sympathizers of the breed believe that it is a natural expression of the breed and might be indicative of bliss and tranquility.
After passing gas, the Laekenois will gaze at its owner, staring and waiting for the inevitable reaction: the flare of the nostrils, the wave of the hand in front of the nose, the pulling back of the corners of the mouth.
What pleases the Laekenois is the knowledge that its gas has been noticed and has caused a distinct reaction.
American Foxhounds
From the AKC
American Foxhounds are good-natured, low-maintenance hounds who get on well with kids, dogs, even cats…. American Foxhounds are sleek, rangy hunters known for their speed, endurance, and work ethic.
Eccentricity: Pontification, Jingoistic Tendencies
Every now and then a dog comes along with verbal skills and patriotism to boot. Such is the nature of the American Foxhound.
The American Foxhound, or AmFox, has a long history in America. Closely associated with the Revolutionary War and New England, the American Foxhound is a lover of history–but with a catch. Two catches, in fact.
The first catch is that the American Foxhound enjoys pontification. While the Finnish Spitz is known for its loquaciousness, chattering on about any number of topics, the American Foxhound harkens to the days of yore, when orator Daniel Webster roamed the Land of the Free delivering sterling speeches.
Its strength is its ability to hold to a single topic, sometimes for hours on end, hashing and rehashing the topic, holding to a linear line of reasoning, and ending with a pathos-laden conclusion. The spectacle mesmerizes.
But there is a darker side. While the American Foxhound is a patriot, it holds in its little heart jingoistic tendencies that come out in aggressive pronouncements bordering on xenophobia. To the AmFox, it is the only Foxhound.
English Foxhounds
From the AKC
The English Foxhound is a substantial galloping hound of great stamina. These pack-oriented, scent-driven hounds are gentle and sociable, but rarely seen as house pets. They can be so driven by a primal instinct for pursuit that not much else, including training, matters to them. Owning these noble creatures is best left to huntsmen who kennel packs of hounds or to those experienced in meeting the special challenges of life with swift, powerful hounds hardwired for the chase.
Eccentricities: Dignified Murder of Prey
The English Foxhound comes from a long line of nobility and royalty. Having hobnobbed for so many centuries with the upper echelons of society, it has learned not only how to kill in polite society, but to do so with dignity.
Many humans find this capacity for the dignified murder of prey to be disgusting. They are amazed that the English Foxhound can chase a fox for miles, only to corner it, and having worn it to a frazzle, proceed to tear it to shreds and crush its throat, then have the audacity to say, “Pardon me,” to a companion, should it jostle him during the execution. And of course, the jostled hound’s reply of “Quite, yes,” serves only to drive home the disdain.
The post-kill compliments the dogs give each other, such as, “Well done, old boy”, “There is talley-hoe-ing, and then there is talley-hoe-ing, and I should say that the latter was indeed attained!”, and “Shall we alight to the kennel?” have sent several owners into catalepsy.
It is one thing for a dog to play the savage, with foaming mouth to chase its prey and tear it apart. It is another to do it dispassionately.
Courtesy American Kennel Club
Norwegian Lundehunds
From the AKC
From Norway’s rocky island of Vaeroy, the uniquely constructed Norwegian Lundehund is the only dog breed created for the job of puffin hunting. With puffins now a protected species, today’s Lundehund is a friendly, athletic companion.
Eccentricities: Wheedling compliments coupled with depressive tendencies
Last and least, for all intents and purposes, the Norwegian Lundehund is obsolete. Not only does this guy top the list of least popular dog breeds, but the one purpose for which it was bred, puffin hunting, is now illegal. Talk about an existential crisis. This leaves the breed feeling isolated, suspicious, and out of place.
Norwegian Lundehunds have responded to the Audubon’s Society’s Project Puffin the way only a Norwegian can: with grace, dignity, a smile.
Said one Lundehund, speaking for the breed: “It really is a sign of the times that one can be a puffin and exist without the slightest fear of molestation or decapitation. Utter decadence. An athletic companion. That’s what they are calling us. Oh, yes, how I thrill plodding along behind a fat woman in white sneakers.”
The Lundehund might put on a tough front, but his crimson lining is this: at best, the breed finds its place in the world tenuous. After all, there are plenty of breeds that can twist their necks around, play catch for thirty minutes a day, go on brisk walks, and serve as an athletic companion. Did we mention the sixth toe? The Lundehund does have six toes on each foot. This extra digit leads them to an absurd inner conflict: while they are too weird to live, yet they are too rare to die. And so they march on.
Due to their existential insecurities, Norwegian Lundehunds have taken to wheedling compliments from owners. One favorite line is, “With these six toes, don’t you think I could catch a puffin without any problem?”
When the Norwegian Lundehund finds that the compliments are unsatisfactory, or in the absence of compliments, it grows sad, and weeps.
Many owners find these behaviors appalling. Breeders are aware of this fact and have tried to use psychotherapy to correct the tendency.
“Self-pity is disgusting,” said one breeder, “and finding your purpose for existence obliterated from the earth can be kind of depressing, sort of the way Arthur Dent was depressed and out of sorts when his entire planet was vaporized one day, and he was left to wander the universe. But the only thing to do is soldier on and find a new purpose, like going on a walk, or chewing on something, just like how I did after my wife left me for a woman. For God’s sake, don’t you think I could satisfy a woman without any problem?”
Then the Lundehund has trust issues. It wonders whether its owner will have enough of its purposelessness, its weird toe patterns, its bizarre flexibilities, and one cool day take it to the ocean, perhaps a lake, maybe an inflatable swimming pool, and lighting a cigarette say, “Oh, look, a puffin!” And sending it forth into the water, will produce a double barrelled shotgun and blow out its brains without so much as a warning shot.
Behind the happy Norwegian smile of the Lundehund, behind its apparent joie de vivre, is a breed of compliment-fishers and depressives that won’t find true happiness until one fine day they are sent out to finish off the puffin, once and for all.
One last note on the Lundehund: This breed, having exhausted all possibilities of working out its original usefulness, enjoys contriving problems and solving them. Its specialty is the correction of credit problems associated with identity theft. After selling its owners identity and allowing others to trash the owner’s credit, it helps to rebuild that credit through a process it calls Puffin Stuffin.
The Last Gasp
With so many obscure and unpopular dogs to choose from, you can’t go wrong with one of these unpopular companions…eccentricities and all….
